The boys had a wonderful time today. One of Steve's dreams was fulfilled today, with the help of his friends Tom Jones, Chad Porfily and Ted Wachsmuth. These amazing men spent the whole day in my garage reorganizing everything so they could build a platform that would be large enough to set Steve's trains up. It truly touched my heart how patient and caring they were with Jeremy. He helped all day and even went to Home Depot with them to get supplies.They were able to build a platform that has a hole where Jeremy can run the trains from the switchboard. Steve had wanted to do that for so long and it's so wonderful to see something he dreamed about fulfilled. After a lot of reorganization, I can still park my car in the garage too!
Steve loved the trains. He took Jeremy to different hobby shops and model train shows. I'm so glad he got to do that with Jeremy. It does make me sad that Will won't have that with his Daddy, but the three guys that were over here today made that pain a little less. They may not be my sons' Daddies, but their heart for my boys brings tears to my eyes.
All of these memories of Steve have come rushing over me in the last few hours. I was updating my phone and a song came up in my list that makes me smile. Steve and I found out we were pregnant with Jeremy on September 11, 2001, needless to say, very mixed emotions on that day. We lived in a cozy 1 bedroom duplex at the time. We knew we had to move, so we signed a lease while we were in London that November for a 3 bedroom townhouse. In February, we were still relishing the last few months of our time together as a couple before our first born son would arrive in May. As some of you know, Steve loved country music. When we started dating, I did not. However, I was the assistant event manager for the Santa Clara County Fair so we had the opportunity to see some amazing concerts, the first one being Tim McGraw. He was just starting to be popular back then. Let me tell you, he had me at "Don't Take the Girl"!!!
That got me hooked, I like country music from that point forward. I'm not a huge fan anymore, but I have my favorites, mostly the concerts that Steve and I went to: Tim McGraw and Faith Hill of course, John Michael Montgomery (our wedding song was "I Swear"), Tracy Lawrence (he's a Sigma Pi) and then there's Garth.
That's where my memory lane lead me tonight...Steve and I were talking one night about our future and that we were a little nervous about having Jeremy. There was a Garth Brooks concert on TV. We had seen him in concert a couple of times so it was fun to watch. "The Dance" came on and Steve pulled me off the couch and danced and sang to me. I just remember wrapping my arms around his neck and gazing into his beautiful hazel eyes. We were so in love. When the song was over, "If Tomorrow Never Comes" came one. We continued dancing and he sang me every word of that song. When it was over, he leaned down and whispered, "I hope you know I love you more than anything, never second guess that. July 8, 1994 (the night we started dating) was the most amazing day of my life and I will be thankful you said yes everyday for the rest of my life."
A little over 8 years later Steve was taken from me and I can say I know he loved me and I know he loved our boys. I look at that train set tonight and I'm crying tears of joy my love. I cannot wait to see you again. I will miss you and love you every day for the rest of my life.
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